The distance between who we are and who we want to be can seem great. There are always ways that we can improve ourselves, always changes to be made. That's why I'm starting this blog.

I want to be a good writer, someone who can create smooth, impactful sentences that somehow communicate more than the sum of the actual words on the page. But, right now, I feel awkward and hesitant. I want to improve my writing skills. How do I do that? How do I go from this weird discomfort to easy facility? How do I get myself to the other side of the montage? I must write.

That's what this blog is going to be about. No, not just improving my tacky writing skills, but about getting through to the other side of success. It's a gradual process, and there won't be any upbeat exercise tracks about how I need a hero, or dancing, or eyes of tigers. No, real change happens when we are alone with ourselves, refining who we are through reflection and selection. We choose who we want to be. In order to do that, I have to become ok with being alone.

Being alone makes me panic. I admit it. I have serious anxiety issues when I'm not totally occupied. I don't use my time well when I'm in that Oh-my-god-my-life-is-worthless place. I hide in Netflix. I can't afford medication or therapy, so this will just have to do.

This blog is going to help me choose who I want to be. It's probably not going to be interesting to anyone else, but maybe someone will benefit from seeing someone gradually change. Or maybe it will be a cautionary illustration of how to crash and burn. Either way, I'll be changed on the other side of this montage. Maybe I'll be thin and strong, maybe I'll be 400 lbs. Maybe I'll be socially stable, maybe I'll turn into a total recluse who only socializes on Facebook through Farmville. Maybe I'll be better, but I'll definitely be different. It's my choice though, who comes out on the other side of this.

I lied about the music. I'll go cue up Eye of the Tiger. Oh, and Just Dance. And maybe the original version of I need a hero. Ok, fine, the Shrek 2 version too. Perhaps also some Canned Heat?